Feminism Schmeminism! I am woman, hear me ROAR!

Bismillahir Rahmaanir Raheem.

I don't want equality with men. Read that again. I don't WANT to be equal to a man. I want my softness, my feminine mystique, my coquetish ways and my unique ability to be frail when I actually want my man to come help me hang the curtain!! It doesn't mean I'm less than a man. It means I'm different, and I LIKE being different. Spare me the feminine crap that "men have all the perks and women don't". Guess what? In Islam, a man has to work, to provide for his home, has to see to the needs of his family, and what a woman makes she may choose to keep (although if she's a good woman she will share with her family). Does this sound like something you wanna trade? So what if in return, the woman (who can have her own career) should love and take care of her family - after all she is the one with the HEART to do it!

I say that the man is like the backbone of his home , and the woman therfore is the heart, the lungs and the guts! It is her who must FEEL the love first; BE the love, and promote the love (heart). She is also the breath of freshness to her husband when he's down just as he (as backbone) must hold her up when she is down. She should breathe new vigour and joy into him just and he should bend to assist her and rise to raise her up. She's the guts because she must have a gut-feel of what's wrong and what opportunities are out there, even if he, as the backbone, is stuck with the labour of getting it done. A woman buys and sells property, grows the home, and makes the decision with her heart concerning what should be done for love to GROW.. Without that, you get wishy washy relationships of attemped equality on uneven grounds (because we are differently wired) and a diatribe of hidden agendas for superiority that help no-one!

Some rights in Islam are inviolable - the rights of women are inviolable. The right to be loved and looked after, if you're a woman, is one of these. Of course every right comes with duties, otherwise they lead to ARROGANCE. There are some rights that in Islamic law cannot be taken away or given up by anyone, not even herself, including the above. A woman cannot CHOOSE to give up certain rights, these are inviolable.  So WHY on God's good earth would ANYONE want to do away with a  woman's right to be a woman or man's right to be a man? Is one better than the other or are they different, unique, special in their own right?

Tell me - (me being "just" a woman and all in the eyes of the feminist chickeroo)- WHY is it so important for you to see my hair? Why do you wish to take away from me the right to dress, but give me the right to UNDRESS and then call it POWER? huh?!

WHY is it so important that you glimpse the skin on my legs or my arms or my cleavage? Is it because you have defined freedom as other than I have defined it and wish to force YOUR will upon MY rights? Don't I get to SAY who I reveal those to? Who says I have to smile and eat and play along with you, oh strange male/female? - I am WOMAN HEAR ME ROAR!! I choose WHO I reveal myself to. It is my RIGHT. Islam has given it to me and it is my HUMAN right in society; if you don't have it maybe you need a copy of the quran and a good muslim man. lol... So tell me, don't I have a RIGHT to my own body, my own personality? Homesexuals do, feminists do, christians do, hindus do, budhists do, jehova's witnesses do, mormons do, DO I NOT HAVE A RIGHT TO DRESS myself in accordance with MY faith and my rights therein?


Sisters, have we, in our search for equality with men, forgotten our RIGHT TO BE WOMAN, to choose who sees what of us, by covering from strangers? Who are YOU, society, to say I cannot cover, but I may undress?!

I have some new-age friends who talk about 2012 being the "Year of the woman" and "The return of Lilith" (don't ask, and don't google.. lol) - the year where "woman take power and woman become the leaders of the world", yada yada yada, **YAWN... . Hello?! ... I already HAVE power, and we women already ARE the leaders of the world (and guess what - the hereafter in a sense too) because WE are the main influence in the lives of the little boys who become the MENof tomorrow to bring home the macon and we teach them about the satisfaction and joy of the "little wife".There is more "power" in being a woman, more "power" in a good woman's little finger, than a hundred hard worker, bring-home-the-makon type of guy. But aaah..., it depends on your definition of power.

Women:
WE are the ones who's tears Allah collects and counts;
When a wife is unhappy with her husband, her husband's very sustenance is affected, according to hadith.
WE are the ones who get to spend time making Duah and
We are the ones who bring up the kids that make up the world of tomorrow - the wives, the husbands.
WE have a duty to ourselves and the future of our kids to ensure we do it right - with HEART

WHY, then, oh WHY would i choose to give up everything I have and AM as a woman to, what ....- be like a man? LOL!!!. Aren't there enough MEN around to be MEN?

Now let's look at men -
MEN are wonderful beings!! They are practical, solution orientated, long suffering, insecure (in many cases in secret), tender hearted, rough and tumble, friendly individuals with a great big desire to know Allah (insh'Allah), and who spend their lives working really hard to attain whatever they have - for you, sisters, and for them. They struggle with their eyes because they have such passion in themm you gotta love 'em! Don't they have the right to be themselves and to fight their internal battles and to slay the dragon for the woman of their dreams?  And WHY would you, oh woman, want that, if it's not in your genetic make-up and it means you are going to find yourself struggling ALL the time to prove you're what - different to what you really are created like? Sounds like a hell of a lot of trouble, a heck of a lot of P.T. -  to live a lie..

WE, women can work, have an education, change the world with our efforts and our science and our contribution and that which comes from our womb!- We can have a career, by all means, but please, let's remember that we first and foremost are the BEAUTY and the SOFTNESS and the HEART of the human race. The KINDNESS of the human experience - oh beauty Divine that thought this up, what an honour and a priveledge!

Sister, your man may slay the proverbial cow but its you who add flavour to the meal of his every day. (and yes some men are excellent chefs but I think you know what I'm driving at).

Take TWO scenarios:

1) Man comes home, tired from a day's work. A good WOMAN, also tired, will wait a while before jumping him with complaints, see to his need for food after the day's "hunt" and THEN vent her own stories -(because being the heart of the home, you listen to the one who's the most in need and right now, its him.) She's free to complain about her day or just vent about X, y, or z and he (being the backbone and wanting to make a difference as all men wish to prove their ability to "fix it") is focussed enough to answer with love and solutions (gotta love that fix it attitude of a man's full tummy!) A wize woman, (a real  !!WOH - MAN!!) knows that. But a woman seeking equality with men does not know that; she is blinded by her desire to have her own needs met first.. so is it becomes a competition of who deserves more!! Why? A woman seeking equality will argue - "why are his  needs more important than mine." Feminist Chickeroo, I submit to you,  just doesn't get that they BOTH important, but because a woman is stronger at HEART level, she can wait a little. She is softer, so she can LOVE more, she can endure more, and she knows in her heart, too, that she will be rewarded MORE when her man listens whole heartedly and full tummied, bringing his backbone to uplift her whilst feeling safe enough to expose his hidden, sensitive nature to the fore. Women  who are women don't loose sight of the HEART. Women trying to be "equal" to men don't loose sight of the Battle - they're always keeping tabs on who got their needs met first. Jeez Louise, sisters!! Just let yourself  BE at peace to love and you will be rewarded so much more, insh'Allah! Let your man be him and he will reward you in many ways. Walk on his backbone and he'll walk out on your heart - eventually.

2) Okay, so take the opposite scenario, the "FREE-DUMN" scenario (lmao)-  The woman comes home from work , the stay at home husband complains about the kids and the chores as soon as she walks in cause he's not wired to wait.. he immediately avalanches her with his problems, the chores, and he "hands over" the house because he can't take no more. ("I've given it all I've got, Capt'n!" ) Men's self esteem is directly linked to their ability to provide and to BE the backbone, not the washing line pole! (even though they will help with laundry if you ask nicely, why shouldn't they?- our Nabi (pbuh) did?) They do the feely feely thing but they are just wired differently and there's nothing wrong with that! Men also generally don't have the patience TO wait, dear sisters,  - a good woman knows that's her  strength!). But if you're patient, they will soften like a fresh date in the sun of your loving heart! So here he is - at the end of YOUR day, resentful that he has to do things that do not make him feel PRODUCTIVE - and he gradually becomes more angry and mroe resentful.Why should we expect them to be okay with it? if its' about equality, that is? But then, Feminist Chickeroo, is it actually about you wanting to be "all" and your man a "sidekick"

.. If you've ever faught for women's rights you'll know that no man deserves to take a right from a woman, and VICE VERSA. More men are abused daily by women yet keep silent because, well, they are MEN!

Beware the HEARTBROKEN woman with an an unsupportive man, and beware the DOWNTRODDEN man with the wounded pride. Both are very dangerous creatures! It's a recipe for IMPLOSION!  In the words of an old ditti "One step further and my back will break - if my best isn't good enough then GIRL can it be good enough for two?"

People, pure Feminism doesn't seek equality with men - don't let it fool you. It's on a powertrip full of hunger for power, vengeance and fury, wanting to erradicate marriage, what they perceive as "traditional roles".

Essentially, feminism isn't looking for equality - it's  looking for SUPERIORITY!
We ARE created EQUAL already- but we're also made "different" - not to be less, but to be complementary to one another, for the good of both. The reader on the backfoot with Islam will say "oh but Islam says that man are created a degree higher". Yes, dearie... it says that, now finish the sentence... - "IN RESPONSIBILITY"...  - therefore if they are responsible for MORE, they need to be able to make some final decisions, is that not so?? Not ALL decisions, not ALONE, to to exclusion of the wife's wishes - that's not Islam - that's PRE-Islam..


William Baker, a Christian leader writes: “ When we consider the status of women in pre-Islamic societies, we learn that two-thirds were in some form of slavery…..women were nearly invisible in a male-dominated world in nearly every religion and very culture of the world.”
It is clear that the women in the seventh century, were nearly invisible in a male dominated world, in nearly every religion and very culture….” Two thirds of the women throughout this world are in some kind of slavery.”

And a blog writer replies (I forget where it is now, so if you ever read this, please drop me a line so that I can reference you) "Then along comes Islam, as if out of the blue, completely revolutionizing women’s rights; even giving them some rights that the west has yet to grant to women in some parts of the world. These rights were given to the Muslim women of the seventh century. They did not have to fight for their rights, did not have to participate in demonstrations, or go on hunger strikes, as their western sisters had to. They did not have to even lift a finger. These rights were given to them by this new religion of Islam. No one had to force the Holy Prophet of Islam to grant these rights to women. These rights were their due as human beings and Islam was the fulfillment of all religions, so they were liberated from the centuries of oppression." SO SO true!


In closing, The Quran says that Jannat (paradise) lies at the feet of a mother. Not a man, not a father, not a brother - A WOMAN. Some hadiths for your enjoyment:


 

“Whoever marries a woman solely for her power and position, God will only increase him in humiliation. Whoever marries a woman solely for her wealth, God will only increase him in poverty. Whoever marries a woman because of her beauty, God will only increase him in ugliness. But whoever marries a woman in order that he may restrain his eyes, observe cautiousness, and treat his relations kindly, Allah puts a blessing in her for him and in him for her.”

and lastly...

A man came to the Prophet and said, ‘O Messenger of God! Who among the people is the most worthy of my good companionship? The Prophet said: Your mother. The man said, ‘Then who?' The Prophet said: Then your mother. The man further asked, ‘Then who?' The Prophet said: Then your mother. The man asked again, ‘Then who?' The Prophet said: Then your father. (Bukhari, Muslim).